These are the things I’ve been reading and thinking about this week.
Her Facebook Disaster Show (Salon)
This bit from the article sort of sums it up:
As I watched her misery unfold, a strange thing started to happen to me. It wasn’t pretty, and it wasn’t nice, and it wasn’t something I could talk about without feeling the tight noose of judgment around my own neck. I began to feel good. I began, even if only for those few minutes spent checking her page, to stop doubting my own life. It was Facebook Schadenfreude. I had it bad.
I find pieces about how Facebook makes us feel interesting because I chose to disconnect my own Facebook for myriad reasons. I don’t miss it and I think I’m emotionally much healthier without it, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t relate to posts like this, about concepts like Facebook Schadenfreude (or my personal favorite, fremdscham, which is embarrassment on the behalf of someone else).
The piece makes a great point about the difference between the posts from people you know and the ones you merely watch. There’s a lot to think about here with regard to sharing on the internet and how we relate to one another in a social media drenched world.
How to Survive the Death of a Friendship (Bitches Gotta Eat)
I totally understand that the style of Bitches Gotta Eat isn’t for everyone. There are times when the style even grates on me. But this piece about ending friendships is both funny and very very true:
and i know what you’re thinking, “WHO WOULD EVER WANT TO STOP BEING YOUR FRIEND, SAM” and the answer is: three or four dummies i had to search through my gmail contacts to delete because i got hacked and the thought of spamming that one jerkface with phony weight loss URLs and uncashed nigerian royalty checkswas motherfucking excruciating. i couldn’t let her know that my password choice was weak, I AM TRYING TO BE THE WINNER OF THIS BREAKUP. because i’m petty.
Powell offers practical advice on how to move on, too, telling us to “juice that lemon” once the friendship is over:
the hardest thing about being a good friend, for me, is biting my tongue while my friends do and say the stupidest shit ever. have you ever had to keep a straight face while pretending the woman across the table from you is a smart, rational human being as she describes why the items she found while digging through her boyfriend’s trash have led her to believe he’s cheating on her with a co-worker? no!? WELL I FUCKING HAVE.
AT 18, Buffy the Vampire Slayer is Still Revolutionary (The Atlantic)
Happy birthday, Buffy:
Television has had lots of complex, admirable teenage heroines since Buffy, but it’s hard to think of one so consistently empowered to take control of the circumstances around her, whether in the middle of a graveyard, surrounded by vampires, or in her bedroom, grounded. Buffy’s super-strength is a physical attribute endowed by the forces of destiny, but it’s also a state of confidence and competence that carries her through the varying traumas of having the fate of the world always on her shoulders.
What got you reading and thinking this week?